Since the 1950s, psychologists have understood that the earliest bonds we form quietly author the relationships we build for the rest of our lives — but it is only now, in the age of social media, that this insight has become a kind of shared language for millions seeking to understand why they love the way they do. Attachment theory, developed by John Bowlby and carried forward by decades of research, identifies four patterns of relating — anxious, avoidant, fearful-avoidant, and secure — each rooted in how reliably care was offered in childhood. As the framework spreads from academic journal